Bar/Bas Mitzvah Guidelines

Mazel Tov!! on the forthcoming Bar/Bas Mitzvah in your family. We would like to assist you in making your simcha a memorable and enjoyable one and accommodate your needs and wishes as much as possible. Below you will find a list of synagogue customs and an information sheet that will help us in our job in serving you over the course of the Shabbos simcha. We kindly ask that you provide basic information such as the names of your family members, individuals you would like to lead the services and the Hebrew names of those to be called to the Torah, etc... (see forms).

For the sake of efficiency, we kindly request that the information be completed and returned to the Shul office two weeks in advance of the simcha. This will help provide enough time for clarification and changes to be made if necessary before the event.

Some have the custom to throw candy at the Bar Mitzvah boy as he is on the bimah. Our custom is to wait until his completion of the Haftorah and its concluding blessings for the candy to be thrown. We therefore kindly request to delay in passing out the candy until after the conclusion of the Torah reading. An announcement will made to the congregation about this custom. We also kindly request that the list of synagogue customs (minhagim) be read and followed. If there are any questions, please do not hesitate to discuss them with the Rabbi or the gabbai.

There are several options to choose from for families celebrating a Bas Mitzvah. For example, some choose to celebrate the Bas Mitzvah over Shabbos. If that is the case, the family can reserve the same honors for the services as in the case of a Bar Mitzvah. The Bas Mitzvah girl is offered the option of speaking following services in the social hall at any time. Another option is to reserve the social hall for a reception other than on Shabbos. Please consult the Rabbi with any questions you may have as you begin planning your simcha.

It is also very important to secure the date of your simcha with the Shul office as soon as you have selected one. As conflicts do arise, clear communication must be established to ensure that the Rabbi, gabbai and officers can accommodate your simcha. It is also advisable to check the CTA calendar as well as the community calendar in order to avoid any potential conflicts.

Once again, Mazel Tov to your entire family on this wonderful occasion. Again, we hope to assist and serve you in any way we can.

Minhagim of Congregation Ahavas Sholom

Erev Shabbos:

Mincha is led from the front amud (lectern) in the sanctuary. Members of the Shul with an obligation to lead the services (example: yahrzeit, mourner, etc...) will be given precedence over someone without an obligation. If a member of the family or a guest of the Baalei Simcha also has an obligation, the Rabbi will be consulted as to who is given preference.

NOTE: Please share with those who will be leading the services that the custom of Congregation Ahavas Sholom is to conduct the services in nusach sefard. If there are any questions based on the variations in the service, please consult the Rabbi and/or the gabbai for assistance.

Kabbolas Shabbos:

Kabbolas Shabbos is led from the center bimah until the prayer of k'gavna. At that point the chazzan moves to the front amud (lectern) of the sanctuary and continues with the Ma'ariv service. A tallis is worn by the chazzan for the entire service.

Shacharis:

The Shacharis service is conducted from the front amud (lectern) of the sanctuary. The chazzan ascends the front bimah in order to take out the Sefer Torah. In the event Shabbos coincides with a special occasion, such as Yom Tov, Rosh Chodesh, etc., the chazzan should consult with the Rabbi or gabbai for any changes in the service.

Krias HaTorah:

It is very common for the Bar Mitzvah boy to read from the Torah. It goes without saying that careful preparation must be made to accomplish this special task. A basic element in the planning of a Bar Mitzvah is to choose a competent teacher to assist your son in this, as well as leading other portions of the service. The Rabbi will more than happy to help make those arrangements with the family. Please share with the Rabbi the individual who will be training your son.

If there is a family member or guest other than the Bar Mitzvah boy whom you wish to serve as ba'al koreh, please consult with the Rabbi. The Haftorah is read from the side of the center bimah (closest to the windows).

Mussaf:

The Mussaf service continues from the center bimah with a pause after the recitation of Ashrei to allow for the Rabbi to recite the prayers for the government and the State of Israel. After Ashrei is concluded the procession of the Sefer Torah begins from the center bimah and follows to the back of the Shul and then concludes on the front bimah where the Sefer Torah is returned to the Holy Ark. It is then customary for the Bar Mitzvah boy to deliver his sermon from the Rabbi's lectern in the center of the bimah. The Rabbi is more than happy to assist the Bar Mitzvah boy in the preparation of the sermon. If you already have prepared a sermon it is kindly requested that the Rabbi be given an opportunity to review it for possible comments and suggestions. A presentation is made to the Bar Mitzvah boy following the completion of his sermon. The Bar Mitzvah boy then takes a seat on the bimah while the Rabbi delivers his sermon.

The chazzan continues from the front amud (lectern) with the Mussaf service.

It is customary for younger children (especially family members) to lead the congregation in Ein Keilokeinu and Anim Z'miros, etc.

Mincha:

The Mincha service is led from the front amud (lectern) of the sanctuary. A tallis is worn by the chazzan for the entire service. If you wish to honor more friends and guests with aliyos for the Mincha Torah reading, please contact the gabbai in advance.

Other Important Notes:

The custom of many synagogues is for the chazzan not to repeat any words, as in the form of a melody, during the repetition of the amidah prayer. This is also a custom of Ahavas Sholom. If there are any questions with regard to other prayers, please consult the Rabbi and/or gabbai.

It is customary to include the Rabbi in one of the aliyos. If there is a need to have hosafos (additional aliyos) please consult the Rabbi and/or gabbai.

Any family member who wishes to share some words with the congregation is welcome to do so following services in the social hall.

Please consult the Rabbi or gabbai with any other questions.

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